A court case caught my attention recently.
Broke my heart is what it did.
It reminded me of a routine humiliation I went through as a little girl.
It’s something I never found anyone to relate to because it was such a unique molestation.
And then, decades later, I read this blatant horror.
Though it took my breath away, I’m fully aware that the trolls dragging our society into this Black hole as they are, are doing so with shrugs all around and with nothing but a sense of indifferent glee-over being so thoroughly hidden and thoroughly effective.
Like all good cowards tend to do and be.
I was moved to write a bit of fiction about an “everywoman” character stuck in this nightmare.
It’s the only thing I’m able to do, unfortunately..being in the same ragged and wretched boat as everyone else in this world..as nothings and nobodies at the mercy of even the highest courts in this land.
At the very least, stories such as these can (or should) bring about a more sobering reality of how much trouble our daughters truly are in…if we continue turning to a smiling and “caring” System for answers.
When it couldn’t care less if we lived or died a thousand deaths each and every day.
(No, there was no Mr. So-n-So for me.
It was more like Mr and Mrs. So-n-so before they headed off to bed..if it matters.
Which it doesn’t. Not anymore.)
I Was A Woman. I Guess.
“I am a woman.
And I did a bad thing.
I stole some money and other things that landed me in prison.
I don’t believe all that much in making excuses, but you seem like you may understand.
About the single mom. Poor, desperate and such.
I was raised with a lot of good, a little of the bad. Nothing special.
I chased after butterflies as a little girl.
When I got a little older, I tried chasing a few dreams.
Maybe the same as you.
I am a woman. And a bad thing happened to me last week.
I’m still in prison, as I will be for a few more years. As I know and accepted.
I don’t get into any extra trouble but found myself being punished anyway.
Like one of those bad times I had as a little girl
with “Mr. So n So”
When he had me take off my clothes and lay down on the bed
so.. he could get “a good look at me.”
He said I had to keep it a secret or else my parents would be pissed, you know?
He’d touch himself and I’d keep my eyes closed.
Burning with shame.
Wishing I could shrink. Needing desperately to disappear. Although I never once did.
I suppose that’s not quite what you’ve experienced.
I’m a woman.
And it took a minute or two getting that pain behind me.
Well.. until last week.
When I was told to strip.
Told to spread my privates wide open.
In front of men’s eyes.
Burning with shame.
Wishing I could shrink. But because
I am a woman
I choked down the tears. Hard.
Because I fought too long and went through too much in this life
to end up letting these folks see me break down like a little girl…
I am a woman.
Or at least I thought so.
Not this voiceless and worthless and helpless Thing that
I was taught
I was promised
I was assured
and reassured that I would never be
As the woman I only thought I was.
written by Ramsy
photo By eugenepartyzan
A video loop by © elroce (adobestock.com) combined
with “Massive Attack”‘s song “Antistar”.
For a potential illusion, stare at the eye of the action for at least 30 to 60 seconds, then shift focus on the red and black “record sun” picture by © grandeduc (adobestock.com).
We are living online now.
And we’re in our infancy stages.
With bad grandparents and really bad parents taking care of us.
Sleeping in concrete cribs and drinking sour formula.
With their grotesque cooing and grinning faces above.
Spooking us away from a decent night’s sleep.
We are loving online now.
And we have no business doing that.
When we do so badly on the earth that we walk on now.
Unable to protect or care for one another.
Despite blessings of having all five senses at our disposal.
What an exquisite delusion.
Believing ourselves capable in such ways.
In an atmosphere which allows success with the benefit of only one.
Which, by the way,
isn’t a single one of the five.
art By grandeduc
words By Ramsy
They’re both about being a Man.
“The Arrangement” from 1969, starring Kirk Douglas and Faye Dunaway.
“Death of a Salesman”
Whether he makes it big or not. Whether he’s perfect or not. Strong or weak.
They’re about being a Father and a Son at the same time-with all of the desires, potential and realities in between.
They’re about the miracle and sorrows of any Man’s life and the unlimited choices he’s able, and most importantly, entitled to make for Himself.
photo By stcom
Just the thing many of us may need..in order to muster enough courage to rush up and snatch the silicon disguises off of the first “aliens” to pop out of some ridiculously huge “UFO” which may “come in peace to show us a better way”.
We’ve been played for fools much too long to continue being played ..to the detriment of a humane existence for our progeny.
Copy it, save it, check out whatever links you can and when you can.
Before we can undo these cuffs cutting into our wrists, we need to shatter the bands worked into and tightened around our minds…whatever precious amount is left of them.
Enjoy the studies, take care.
photo By RuPhoto
Another marriage of digital yin and audial yan. A sort of daydream break.
The song is “What Your Soul Sings” by Massive Attack and Grantley Marshall from the
“100th Window” album.
photo by blackday
Dearly Beloved….we are gathered here to witness the union of digital soulmates
Song and Loop.
Song=Massive Attack’s “Small Time Shot Away” and art video loop = greenbelka (adobestock.com)
witnessed by Ramsy as being perfect for one another
With Featured photo By DD25