There are so many odd little questions. Their oddness being the universality of their existence yet lack of resolution at the same time.
One example is when we demand to see the individual that our stray lovers take up with behind our backs. Women and men alike, insisting upon meeting and knowing the new love interests. Why?
It’s usually a shock to those of us, who end up confessing, as to why the one whose heart you just stabbed would take both hands and draw the knife even deeper into her/his own breast.
For many it is just not a remotely logical request of effort. Not when many are only prepared to expend the most precious energy of their lives.. begging on knees for that second chance.
They want to know whether you lied or told the truth when you professed your adoration and appreciation of their physical selves. If your new girl is a redhead with a wide backside and the ex is as well, then you’re in a better clear. She will spend a generous majority of her tears on how she “didn’t get it right.” If your love interest is a lanky, older exotic beauty from Sri Lanka, then the tears will be spent elsewhere. An odd mixture-rage over wasted time and pity about how shabby of a lying creature you truly turned out to be.
Up to and beyond the ends of relationships we forge, it’s usually that tedious “all about ME, me and me again” thing. In the midst of weeping over the loss of “love shared”, there we are. Straining for that peek into the mirror. Sniffling and trying to rearrange the bloodshot eyes and raccoon mask into something more flattering. As if our “looking good” is all that matters; despite the pain for all involved and the fact that it’s a big honking lie.
There shouldn’t be any cause for any man or woman to insist on knowing details or viewing an “opponent” who probably had no idea they were even in a battle to begin with. Such a mean spirited thing to do to oneself..
-either gauging the worthlessness of oneself and planning on the amount of self hate to carry.
-or gauging how much punishment to inflict and planning on how much additional hate to carry…as if the troubles that killed the relationship weren’t heavy enough.
There’s also no reason why we can’t try to find as many answers to the questions that pester us endlessly. Especially if it helps make a dent in that bone deep Selfishness..which seems to be running through us like