This is a letter I’ve wanted to send to publications for a while now (print and/or online)
Those that still publish the full names of men arrested as “johns” for prostitution.
I would like to know some things.
1- Why is it necessary to publish the names of men who are arrested for alleged sex crimes? What gives us the right?
2-Is there anything that can be done to retire this public square humiliation of a practice? A petition? Or is there a process already in place for these kinds of matters?
We live in a world where there’s an infestation of “watching what you say” paranoia.
One can’t call a black woman “dark” or a chubby woman “fat” without potential and immediate groans of outrage sounding from one group or another.
We don’t dare call a transgendered male by the pronoun he was obviously lumbered with since birth. For one could possibly expect a quick trickle to flood of hate emails and insults-depending where one said it. When one happens to forget that free speech and personal opinions are no longer respected as personal rights.
I’m not aware of the list of folks whose feelings take priority in this world. Maybe I should know, but I don’t.
I would like to ask why these men and their families aren’t entitled to at least a portion of such overblown courtesy.
These men whose names you publish, do you check to see why they were soliciting for sex?
Would you extend the courtesy of leaving the name out in the case of a widower who lost his wife and too heartbroken to start a serious relationship?
Or are we to believe they are all just animals actively involved with girls being forced and beaten into sex slavery?
Do you find out if any of the men have children who go to school or wives who go to work?
I ask because both could suffer greatly at either of those places. Whispers. Jokes. Nasty looks. Looks of pity. A neighbor or twenty getting wind of their brother, father, husband or son on a list of sexual “deviants”. The possibilities for cruelty, especially with the youngest of children, are countless. Lost jobs. Friends. Divorce. Fights. One ugliness after another.
The whole point of the P.C. panic is to avoid actions that could possibly happen, correct?
In my state, men lose their car and license for the sex crimes.
I would think this awful punishment should satisfy WELL above and beyond the call of law’s duty.
This listing of names is additional punishment being doled out on top of an already harsh sentence. We’re not only kicking a man while he’s down. We’re ripping all of his clothes off to leave him naked during the attack.
Goodness only knows how many men lost their jobs as a result of having their transportation taken away from them.
Who even knows how many families were evicted or couldn’t afford to eat because of whatever snowball out of hell bore down on them-all because a male member of their family forgot “his place”.
Never mind the single men who were barely struggling to get by. Or the ones deemed so undesirable that no one will date them even if they could afford a dinner on a date.
Their lives are already very and sadly at the breaking point due to the laws which are in place for their transgressions.
I’m not here to argue the law.
It has grieved me deeply for years that publications do such a thing. As if we still lived in the age where people were pelted with rotten vegetables , locked in stockades. The public hooting and carrying on as if the monkeys somehow got on the other side of the cage in a zoo.
I thought we were more sophisticated than that. More sensitive than that. Right?
Why on this earth would we continue to put the names, right next to their poor faces, up for all of the world to see..when we’re mincing and harassing one another over what words we say to one another?
Why is it quite all right to place the visual of some grandchild’s grandfather’s penis and what he dared to do with it into the mind’s eye of countless strangers, neighbors and family members?
At a time where we nearly lose our mind over what an objectifying and violent thing the human male’s whistle is to the poor and defenseless female walking by. We can’t even spare enough mercy to allow human beings to endure their deepest private shames out of the minds and mouths of people who know nothing about them.
Can anyone of you (who have a say on whether these names get published or not) even begin to imagine that same shame and destruction raining down on any one of the men you love? It’s a tired and naïve question, I understand.
However, if the welfare and emotional sanctity of your own loved ones is not something that deserves careful and humane consideration, then I guess it’s of little use expecting a serious solution for the “johns” who get marched to the center of the square. When they didn’t murder anyone. When they didn’t steal from anyone.
Is it possible? Is there a chance you could cease publishing names and simply leave these poor souls to deal with serving their true sentences and rebuilding their lives in anonymity?
Is there an avenue that can be taken?
feature photo By xixinxing
letter sent to http://www.mystateline.com/
via online web form (3-22-2018)
letter sent to Chicago Tribune via
Letter to the Editor email.(3-22-2018)